Friday, October 10, 200811:25 AM

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the pen in my hand scribbles away.
filling the pages with thoughts of fear and of possiblities.
weirdly i came to the point where i wrote about you again.
the things i wrote about you are things that one would not wish to hear about.
one would not be able to take the truth at all.
even if you tink you would be able to take the truth,
it willl still send that pinch of pain and sadness into you.
to know that thats wad i actually tot about you.
the ink filled the empty once alived plain sheets of paper.
the words formed into sentences which slowly formed a paragraph and in the end it fills the pages up.. slowly bit by bit.

incredibly blinded by many lies that formed the world around me that was told by the sea of ants with me.
the humans, that i trust to be true to me.
the humans i trust to stick with me through thick and thin,
who would allow me to understand them and for me to understand them too.
however, ive lied to myself too much about the kindness in mankind.
the things that i tot i would never noe.
the things that i tot would never surface up and show the true faces to me again.

the understanding of human beings.
the interpretation of a human.
the reading and analysis of a human being.
the misconception of a human being.
the assumption we make about a human being when we dun even noe them at all.
is this the way it is goin to be and all.
this is not the way it is goin to be.. to lie to myself that everyone is true to others.
that in front of everyone, theres a facade, a mask that they wear to hide themselves from others.

makin sure they will not be discovered at all.
making sure that they will be safe under those masks.
sure that they would be perfect enough to survive.
would it be enough?

would we be able to survive under this harsh and demanding world.
this society that needs to be judged by mani and at the same time be manipulated by alot of ppl.

i do not wish to live in a world full of lies at all.
i do not wan to noe that i am goin to live in a life full of fears and lies that i dun wish to noe.
i dun wish to get hurt and to get rejected at all.
i dun wish for that.
i onli wish for a simple life..

i onli wish for that...


hmmmmm..........